Honestlittlefalcon's blog

Who's breast is it anyway?

How you feed your baby is a personal decision only you should make for your child yet whatever method is chosen there will be debates.  Bizarrely, breastfeeding, which has been the nourishment of choice since time began, has become a controversial issue.  This week Gisele Bundchen said that there should be a law forcing mothers to breastfeed for the first 6 months of their child's life. Whilst I do not agree with this notion I think the virtual flurry of debates it has provoked can only be a positive thing. Perhaps the more celebrity's who speak out about breastfeeding the more new mothers will be encouraged to start - maybe a more radical stance is what is needed to get people really talking (and hopefully breastfeeding).
  

When Salma Hayek spontaneously breastfed a baby in Africa there was a media frenzy debating her intentions behind her actions. In my mind it seems quite logical - hungry baby + breast with milk = feed hungry baby! Her actions, selfless and caring, were twisted and construed as a publicity stunt some even suggesting that it would have been more appropriate to offer the baby formula or express the milk into a bottle first. What is with this idea that the breast is distasteful or unsanitary? Are breasts just for exposing in the bedroom, in strip clubs and the French Riviera? Have we forgotten the real reason why women have breasts?

 From my own experience breastfeeding my baby has prompted numerous questions and odd looks from those around me.  I've been asked why I am breastfeeding and that surely it must be such a pain for me to do so. I have even been told that formula is far better for my daughter than my own breast milk. Now, whilst I do understand this may be the case for some women this is not the case for me.  I have been asked how long I intend to breastfeed for to which I have started lying in order to stop the jaws dropping when I say "I hope at least one year". Its even been assumed that I breastfeed for fun and now that my daughter is 3 months old I should put her on a bottle. Hmmm ... after 6+ weeks of cracked nipples, sore breasts and all the other aches and pains I've just got the hang of it so I am not quitting now!  I never anticipated such interest in what I did with my breasts.

Interestingly, just one in five women who start breastfeeding (which is less than 60% in the US) continue to breastfeed for 6 months despite it being a recommendation from the WHO.  Whilst I understand that there are a number of factors which influence a women's decision to formula feed their baby the debate is certainly a lot more reserved. If anything, formula feeding has become the accepted norm and breastfeeding is the taboo.

 At the end of the day, whist I support any celebrity attention breastfeeding gets, especially if it encourages more women to do it, I am yet to fathom what it matters to anyone else what I do with my breasts (or what you do with yours!)

      

 
 

The Art of Breastfeeding - the early days

During my pregnancy I had the romantic idea that breastfeeding was going to be a sublime experience; beautiful, intimate and above all easy. I knew I wanted to breastfeed and didn't explore any other options - I was actually excited about breastfeeding my child. I attended meetings about breastfeeding, excitedly purchased my nursing bras, nursing pads and a tiny tube of lanolin ointment (just in case I needed it) and I was all set to fulfil that ideal in my mind of being the next Madonna and child. All my preconceptions were shattered the day my baby was born.

 The moment my daughter came into this world she was sucking, hard. She latched on to my breast like a pro and sucked for hours. I was so elated at having given birth to a foodie (like her parents) that I failed to notice that she was destroying my nipples because of improper latch.  In the early days each feed got harder than the last. I'd cry when she cried because I was so terrified of having my tiny baby, who fed like a barracuda, back on my breast but I had to feed her. I would grit my teeth and wrestle my newborn baby into all sorts of bizarre positions in an attempt to ease the pain and give her the milk she needed. Before and after every feed I would cover my nipples in lanolin - they were ugly, deformed, cracked and very, very sore - I spent the first weeks of my daughter's life topless and it was far, far from anything sexy - how could this be normal?

Some people told me it was not normal. That breastfeeding shouldn't hurt especially after 2 weeks. I felt I had failed. I was miserable. It DID hurt. I turned to friends and family for their advice and support to only realise that they too, had forgotten the pain or obviously took to breastfeeding like a duck to water.  I was lucky enough to have one friend who told me to ignore everyone, yes it hurts and pain has no time limit - as long as the baby was gaining weight my pain was secondary and it was only temporary.  The day my tiny baby threw up pink (because I was so cracked and sore she had swallowed blood with my milk) I realised why so many women give up breastfeeding.


However, I was determined not to give up. I found that as my daughter got bigger the feeding got easier - I am not sure if its because we managed to find better feeding positions, or her latch improved allowing me to heal or it was a combination of those things.  For me, it took a good 2 months to be able to say that breastfeeding no longer hurts and its actually become enjoyable. I can assure you that I never thought I'd ever be able to say that. 

I tried pumping so I could give myself a break and a chance to heal but my daughter would never accept the bottle despite all our efforts. It was back to me, and only me to feed her which was time consuming and hard especially when you are tired, hungry, need the bathroom (and sometimes all 3 at the same time)

 Now when an expectant mother asks me what they can do to get themselves ready for breastfeeding I encourage them to read up on it. Usually they have the same notion that I did. Only thing that may have helped me with feeding my little barracuda baby would have been to take the Dyson and attach it to my breasts for 6+ hours a day!  
 

Today I look at my healthy baby girl with her delicious chubby cheeks and that is all the motivation I needed to persevere and get through the pain. Whilst I do not liken myself to a 21st century Madonna with child, my romantic notion that I had pre-baby as far as breastfeeding was concerned aren't as far fetched as I thought when I first started. As cliché as it sounds, the phrase "no pain, no gain" certainly rings true for me and my milk monkey!
  

Giving the gift of breast milk

Last week I decided that I wanted to donate my breast milk - yes, you can donate human breast milk. I had been pumping excess milk for a couple of months, storing it in the fridge and trying to give it to my daughter in a bottle but she was not interested so ultimately she ended up bathing in it! Now, whilst its fabulous for her skin there are much better uses for it. So after a quick discussion with my 3 month old she decided that she was more than happy to share her food with tiny babies who needed breast milk to grow big and strong like her. I called the nearest Milk Bank and signed up!

For those of you who have never heard of it - premature and sick babies need human breast milk to survive. They have yet to find a formula that is suitable for babies in NICU's all around the world. 

 

 I was thrilled to receive my sterile bottles in the post yesterday and I have already pumped my first bottle! 

The tubes there are for the blood tests which are required as part of the donor screening.

I could have dealt with my oversupply issues using various breastfeeding techniques but instead I am celebrating the gift of extra milk and giving it to those who need it. I can only donate until my daughter is a year old so I have a limited time of giving those tiny babies the opportunity to grow big and strong.

Milk banks all over the world have a huge shortage of milk - please consider donating if you can. Every drop counts.  

For more information on milk donation click here

Who said you can't potty train at 3 months?

I stumbled upon Elimination Communication when I was pregnant - its an interesting concept that pre-dates diaper's/nappies and all the debates of today that go with it. Ironically it is Elimination Communication that is now considered to be the controversial stance as far as infant hygiene is concerned. 

 Described as a toilet training practice, "Elimination communication (EC) is when a caregiver uses timing, signals, cues, and intuition to address an infant's need to eliminate waste. 

 
When I mentioned ECing to my friends I have to admit the typical response was "Huh?" and some had  fairly strong views on the subject: "babies at this age aren't cognitively aware enough" and "babies are not aware enough to understand what's going on" and even "children should not be potty trained until they are old enough to be interested in it" or my favourite "I simply don't have time to sit around watching my baby for signs that it needs to pee". 

 Interested in it? Don't have time? When most of the world's population do not use diaper's/nappies what exactly do they do? I can assure you babies who spend their day being carried by their mother's in slings whilst they are at work are not covered in their babies bodily fluids. AND they certainly don't have the time to sit around watching their baby ... SO ... how do they manage without diapers? 

 I realised that the modern world had fallen victim to the diaper industry giants such as Pampers and Huggies and once we realised that they were bad for the environment, the landfills etc... the diaper industry brought back cloth diaper's, made them cool colours and incredibly trendy but in all honesty how eco-friendly is it when you have to wash and dry all those diaper's? All that water and electricity? Plus, give me an example of one mammal that urinates and defecates in their bed out of choice? I digress. 

 Today I decided I was going to start ECing with my little princess. She is 3 months old. It started this morning when she woke up after an 11 hours sleep (yes, my angel!) with dry diaper!  I gave her half a feed as she was starving and then held her over the potty. About 30 seconds of "pssst pssst pssst" sounds she peed in the pot! I was elated! As the day progressed I started to notice how she wriggled and made a certain sound when she needed to go and managed to end the day having only consumed 3 diapers compared to the usual 15+*.  She even held it until we got home and I took her diaper off! 

So today's summary is 9 to me, 3 to Pampers! If everyday was like today I would be happy. Its all about the ones we catch not the ones we miss. Also, ECing does not have to be a full time thing, it can be practised only at the weekends, evenings, whenever really!  

 It was slightly time consuming today but I think my little one preferred it as we definitely skipped the squirming and squawks after she has peed and needs changing. I am certain it will get easier. 
We are also going to save a fortune on diaper's/nappies, rash cream and at the same time I got to know my daughters signs a bit better. More info on the benefits can be found here 

 PS - I do have to admit, you need to be attuned to your baby's needs and pay attention to her sounds and movements in order to EC.

  * our consumption of diapers is high because our little one, since the day she was born, has squirmed and cried the minute she was wet. The upside to changing her so regularly is that we've never had diaper rash.